When Effort Stops Making Sense: Learned Helplessness in the Workplace

There was a time in my career when I naturally went above and beyond.

I built documentation no one asked for but everyone used. I created systems that made our work smoother. I made myself available when people were stuck - on decisions, on performance conversations, on career direction. I did it because I believed in the greater good of the work and the people doing it.

For a long time, I didn't expect recognition. I believed the work itself mattered enough.

But eventually, I asked a simple questions: Could some of this effort be acknowledged?

The response I received changed how I saw everything.

"In this line of work, you need to get used to not being recognized. We're always underappreciated."

That moment stayed with me - not because it was cruel, but because it was

accepted as normal.

And I remember thinking: Why does it have to be this way? If we know this hurts people, don't we have a responsibility to change it?

What we Reward Shapes What We Become

As I looked more closely, I noticed something uncomfortable.

Recognition wasn't absent - it was selective.

Awards, praise, and opportunities were tied almost exclusively to what could be measured: numbers, targets, visable wins. Meanwhile, the work that held teams together quietly went unseen.

The people creating tools behind the scenes.

The ones sharing knowledge outside their job description.

The ones supporting others, improving processes, raising the quality of the work without attention.

When they spoke up, they were often told:

• That's just expected.

• We don't recognize for that

• Do something more impactful.

Over time, a divide formed. Not because people wanted awards - but because effort and outcome stopped feeling connected.

And that's when the shift began.

The Quiet Behavior Change No One Talks About

People didn't disengage loudly.

They stopped raising their hand.

They stopped offering ideas.

They stopped pushing for better ways of working.

Some burned out. Others became robotic. Some took medical leave. And leadership often asked, genuinely confused:

"I don't know why they stopped trying"

But the pattern is there if you knew how to look.

When effort repeatedly goes unseen, the brain learns a lesson:

Trying doesn't matter.

This isn't laziness. It's protection.

Why People Came to Me Instead

As a coach, people began confiding in me quietly.

"I feel invisible unless I hit my stats."

"I do so much more than what's measured - why doesn't that count?"

"Why do opportunities go to people who game the system instead of those who strengthen it?"

They weren't asking to be saved. They were asking to be seen.

I didn't tell them, "This is just how it is"

I acknowledged the reality - and the impact.

I decided to celebrate their work in small, human ways.

I carried their accomplishments into rooms they weren't in. I advocated without tearing anyone else down.

Not because I had power - but because recognition itself is power.

When Science Gave Me Language

Years later, while learning about habit formation to support my own neurodiversity, something clicked.

Habits form through a simple loop:

Cue -> Behavior -> Reward

When rewards disappear, habits don't just fail to form - they reverse.

The concept of Learned Helplessness finally gave words to what I had witnessed.

If effort is met with indifference, dismissal, or silence long enough, people stop offering effort altogether.

It's not immediate, its learned.

Much like a dog that stops responding after being ignored or punished, humans slowly internalize doubt. Not dramatically - but deeply.

And once trust is broken, rebuilding it takes far longer than it took to erode.

This Isn't About Bad Leaders

I don't believe this harm is intentional.

In large workplaces especially, leaders are under pressure to rely on metrics, scale recognition, and avoid appearing biased. Conversations about acknowledgement can be misread as complaining or entitlement.

Add to that another layer we rarely discuss: Personality Differences.

Some people want public recognition. Others don't. When quiet contributors say they don't like loud celebrations, they're often labeled as not wanting recognition at all - which isn't true.

Over time, these misunderstanding compound.

I don't hold anger towards the leaders who influenced my own experience. I hold understanding - and disappointment that we don't train leaders to recognize unmeasured value or understand how reinforcement truly works.

A small Shift That changes Everything

This isn't about grand gestures or more awards.

Its about awareness.

Ask yourself:

• Who gets recognized - and who doesn't?

• What work holds your team together quietly?

• Who has changed their behavior, and why?

• When someone says they feel unseen, do we get curious - or defensive?

Recognition doesn't have to be loud. It does have to be intentional.

Small moments of acknowledgement rebuild trust.

Small reinforcements restore confidence.

Small shifts prevent people from falling through the cracks.

If you've ever been told, "This work is selfless and often unrecognized", I invite you to question that.

We can be part of changing that narrative - One habit at a time.

This reflection is grounded in both lived experience and well-established research on motivation, habit formation, and psychological safety in the workplace.

References & Further Reading

• Seligman, M. E. P. (1972). Learned helplessness.Annual Review of Medicine, 23, 407–412.→ Foundational research introducing learned helplessness and its effects on motivation, performance, and well-being.

• Seligman, M. E. P. (1990). Learned Optimism.New York: Knopf.→ Expands on how repeated environments shape belief systems, agency, and resilience over time.

• Duhigg, C. (2012). The Power of Habit: Why We Do What We Do in Life and Business.New York: Random House.→ Explains the habit loop (cue–routine–reward) and how environments reinforce both positive and negative behaviors.

• Wood, W., & Neal, D. T. (2007). A new look at habits and the habit-goal interface.Psychological Review, 114(4), 843–863.→ Research showing how habits operate largely outside conscious motivation and are shaped by contextual cues and reinforcement.

• Deci, E. L., & Ryan, R. M. (2000). The “what” and “why” of goal pursuits: Human needs and the self-determination of behavior.Psychological Inquiry, 11(4), 227–268.→ Establishes autonomy, competence, and relatedness as core drivers of motivation—directly relevant to recognition and acknowledgment at work.

• Maslach, C., & Leiter, M. P. (2016). Understanding the burnout experience: Recent research and its implications for psychiatry.World Psychiatry, 15(2), 103–111.→ Connects burnout to chronic workplace stressors such as lack of recognition, fairness, and control.

• Gallup (2023). State of the Global Workplace Report.→ Highlights the relationship between recognition, engagement, performance, and retention in large organizations.